Tag Archive | relationship

Switch Initiator

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It’s Wednesday and here at Ok2LoveAgain we like to call it #WednesdayWhen?

When was the last time you was the initiator?
Initiate intimacy, cooking, chores, booking a trip.
Switch your role, switch your position in the relationship. Breathe new life into it, just by switching things up. If you are the initiator in the relationship, find something that you are not use to doing and initiate it. It’s Spring, let new blooms rise up. New roles, new positions, which gives your relationship new life.
If you seem to be more rigid, loosen up. If you’re more planned, be more spontaneous. Order something different from the menu, be optimistic. Very serious, be more playful and add more laughter. Talkative, now become the listener. Shopaholic become the saver. All of these suggestions will give you a new attitude, a different perspective and it will refresh your love.

For singles, switch up what you do. Make new friends, go to different places not the usual. Change your hairstyle, color or add some length.
You will get different reactions, and it will refresh your life. Try it today.

Married Yet Still Me

Don’t get lost, as you go down the aisle of life. You’re married, yet still you.  Keep that internal GPS of you. As you go through your life, dealing with troubles and stress you must always be able to find you.

Be a wife, a parent, and all the other titles you hold, but it is paramount that you don’t lose who you are.

Still go for your dreams, still do the things you love. You wear so many titles yet be the master of you.

You’re so unique and so needed, you’re beautiful, sexy, lovely all things soft yet so very strong.

Celebrate you, love you, inspire you, caress you. What a beautiful being you are, your husband knows, your children recognize, and the mirror reflects what’s inside. You said I do, now say it just for you. Repeat as you read.

I do matter, I do need time for me, I do love me more than I love you. I’m already complete, I’m sexy, I’m intelligent, strong, caring, never fearing losing myself. Red, white, fuchsia, pink all the colors of me as I think. Life begins with me, my womb is the world. I’m married yet still me.

That little girl who use to skip and hide is still inside, she just wants to play hide and seek so go find her.

You’re so unique, one of a kind and so divine. I’m married yet still me.

I have a spouse and I take care of all the inhabitants of my house. It’s clean, and well stocked so many things to do around the clock. I rise with the sun, yet at the end of the day there are still things to be done.

I must take some time replenish, refresh and unwind, it’s so very important I get my me time.

Tomorrow is another day I will answer the many calls of honey, Mom, boss, sister, aunt, friend.  After all is said and done, I must answer to one, me. Married yet still me.

Shh, come here, close the door make time for you, she is here you know and all she wants it time with you.

You will imagine, you will create, you will push and even vacillate, you have the ring yet above all, you are the main thing.

I love my husband we are the ingredients in this marriage. We make this thing called our life, he brings the flavor, I bring the spice.

My mantra is loving myself it’s contagious.  Because when you love yourself others will receive it and Love you to.

Women don’t be your own foe, Whoa! To thine own self be true. Always remember you.

I’m married yet still me.

Audrey Reed is a Life /Marriage Relationship Coach     Aka/MzLoveViewz 

I’m not only a Coach but I’m a product of Relationship Coaching. My marriage was saved by countless sessions by my coach when an affair threatened my marriage. Now it’s my turn to give back.  To empower couples and others to love again, believe again, trust again. @Ok2loveagain.com

Married And Loving It.

Marriages are failing at an alarming rate. Please remember God ordained marriages hold on to your fate.  Let’s celebrate loud and clear ,thank God for your marriages . All couples please share with us, how many years you’ve been married, and tell us something that works for you.

      Love Endures
That same love covers a multitude of sins without it there is no chance to win.
When I was in a state of confusion and pain, betrayed by the one who gave me his name.
Love rescued me from the deepest despair, took away the sin and wipe my tear.
It told me to forgive and go on and live. 
I forgave realizing I to was enslaved.
Here I am now safe and secure a testament how love can endure
My 1st love at my side all the pain I had did subside.
This is our story and not how we boast.
 Now raise your champagne glasses to make a toast,our marriage did remain yes God sustained.
 We are the coaches of Ok2LoveAgain!
Are you encountering any problems in your relationship?
Please call the Coaches @Ok2LoveAgain.com

We’re  here for you, call now for 

A Special limited time  offer of 50 %  off the coaching session fee.

347-330-6471

Love Under Pressure – 7 Key Factors To Keep The Love Alive

Definition of pressure: a: the burden of physical or mental distress  b: the constraint of circumstance:        the  weight of social or economic imposition.

 

This albeit is a difficult thing to do yet obtainable.   As I write in my blog, I want to share things that are encouraging, helpful, and things I experienced 1st hand.

Love under pressure is something I have dealt with countless times during my marriage. Be it financial, children, emotional, you name it we mostly have handled it. When you have two people that are committed to each other in love and matrimony, you just don’t check out. If difficult times come, (error, rephrase) not if, when difficult times come, the question is how do you handle it, and keep your love alive.

When I say alive, it’s because many times your love for one another will need to be resuscitated. Some people like to say “been through a lot but still standing”. I know what they mean but you can be still standing and about to keel over. The kick stand is about to brake.

Let me share what has worked for us,

1) Develop and have a prayer life with God.  The one that sustains you.

Anchor yourself in him, each for yourself and together.

2) You must speak your feelings, your needs and get a plan to tackle the difficulties.

Do not shut down and refuse to communicate. That is a state of withdrawal a divorce.

When you disagree, argue, drop the need to be right, let go of your ego.    If one of you loses you both lose so work on understanding the need or issue from each other’s perspective.  This is more about comprehension and compassion and less about who’s right or wrong.  Hear each other out, resist the urge to interrupt, say I told you so or criticize.  You may not agree and at times you won’t but just understand their perspective on it, and their feelings.   Connect with them if only in their eyes.  Like “ baby I understand”.

I realized earlier on in my marriage is, that if I tear him down verbally, by insults etc.  He is still my man and guess who has to take all that necessary time to build him up again, me.

3) Prioritize things, by order of urgency, at the same time do not shuffle your each other in the process.  He/she must stay at the top, all the rest of the people and issues in descending order.

4) Commit to a time just for the two of you.  During that time it’s all about the both of you, don’t mention the issues.   Whether in the bedroom or go release some tension by playing a game of tennis, basketball, play the Wii. Workout together to release that stress, and tension. Get couples massage, or to save money give them to each other.   Here’s a secret don’t give the massages to each other on the same day, somebody is going to get cheated because the one that gets the massage first will fall asleep.

5) Strategize, make a budget.

Shoulder the responsibilities, talking with bill collectors, which can cause a lot of stress therefore take turns, give the other one a break.  Be honest as possible.

6) When you’re under pressure it is not a pretty picture. It is hard to see them as sexy, handsome, now you’re looking at them with a critical eye.    Try not to internalize it because when you internalize it , it becomes a point where you will look at each other differently.  Almost as if you’re on opposing sides, it will begin to distort the relationship.  I would always remind my husband he’s not sleeping with the enemy, so don’t deal with it by his self.  Don’t go to bed mad and refuse to talk. This will frustrate you and in turn you will look for quick ways out to relieve the pressure.  Vices of every kind, the arm of flesh, gambling, alcohol, etc.  This is the easy way out and must I remind you the wrong way out.  Anybody can succumb to illicit pleasures,but it takes a strong mature person to resist the easy way out. When you’ve done all there is to stand, stand therefore.

7) Give each other a lot of praise and affection which will heal the little tears in your spirit and feelings of humiliation or of being inept.  It will renew your relationship like new skin.

Remember a threefold cord is not easily broken. That consists of the two of you and God. Which can handle anything that can come against you.

Keep the love alive, trust me the pressure will subside.  When it does love will still be there in full force.

Ok2LoveAgain Marriage/Relationships/Life Coaching

Call us for more factors to keep your love alive.

Coach Carl & Coach Audrey Reed

347-330-6471

Have A Sexcessful And Sextacular New Year! pt 3

 Welcome to the Pleasuredom!

Variety is the key, try not to get into a routine. This can be hard with our busy lives but we have to  be vigilant so we can be spontaneous.

Now every time you indulge it doesn’t have to be romantic . Men sometime want to forego the romance and go for the quickie, the freaky, the wild yet all the time keep the respect and loving bond.

This is the Darling Menu , everything you can get from your darling.

Take advantage of his morning salute.

Kiss from head to toe , get lost along the way.

When no one else is home declare your house a nudist camp and do everything in the nude together.

Have dessert on them like a plate.

Blindfold and tie your mate up.

Video tape your sexcapades than watch and enjoy then erase.

Go on a sexual fast, no sex only touch and arousal touch for 10-20-30 days. Then come back together for a renewed heightened experience.   If you do decide to do this you must pick up in the other areas, massage, spa time at home or away, touching to arousal but not indulging. Talking sexy, sexting, little gifts, immersing yourself in loving each other,

Don’t just rekindle, do some new things.

When was the last time you took a shower together?

How about a bubble bath, if you can’t fit in your tub google a hotel that has a Jacuzzi.

Where there is a desire, than you have fuel for the fire.

Midnight picnic in your home.

Try different positions, see how limber you are.

Do it now while you can still do the positions.

Tell your mate exactly what you want, need, if they don’t know tell them verbatim. Show and tell them.

What are your fantasies, your imagination for your intimacy?

Role play, dress up, play truth or dare in the bedroom.

Tie up and blind fold.

Perform a strip tease, lap dance for your mate

Have fun be childlike with adult freedom.

It’s ok that is your partner, you’re adults, enjoy each other.

Change your roles if you’re a professional in your career, when you come home totally relax, switch gears.

Become playful, flirty, and romantic. If you’re use to being the initiator, relax it’s time for your mate to take charge.

I have much more recipes on the menu but I will save for other sextacular articles.

My basis for this article is to encourage you to enjoy one another. Let nothing or no one hinder you from fulfilling your partners desires, and loving them to best of your ability.

It has nothing to do with either you do it or someone else will, that may be true. We are not animals that act on instinct. That is a choice. Put all that energy into your relationship and you will have a  Sexcessful and Sextacular  year and life. This is all conducive to a happier relationship and a happier you. Which makes it Sexcellent

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Ok2LoveAgain  Marriage/Relationships/Life Coaching
Let us  help you get Sextacular Results!
Coach Carl & Coach Audrey Reed
347-330-6471

Have A Sexcessful And Sextacular Year

 Yes, you read it right,  this is a blog for married couples ,relationships.  I know what some of you are thinking ,she loves to talk about sex  and you’re right.  I’m legal, married and very sensual.  Yes I’m still saved and my husband is still a man of God. Let’s be real , they don’t really mention it in church, it’s like you have to go underground to talk about it. When you’re home it comes up after the bills, after the kids, after dinner, after cleaning, after sports and news.  Lights out and ok now we can touch each other late at night  like an afterthought.  Don’t take too long because we have to get back to the more important things on tomorrow.  When you do talk about it with your friends, afterwards you feel guilty like you talked about something dirty.  Not I, because it is part of my nature and I’m a very sensual person. I’m grown and married , not to mention in my prime .  

Most often during marriage at some point your sex life begins to wean. There are a myriad of reasons why, busy lifestyles,  kids , jobs, career, money woes, health,  etc, becoming a routine. So let’s prioritize it again.  MzLoveviewz says It’s Ok2sexAgain .

I believe married people should have the best time of their lives.  Especially sexually, that is our language of love to each other.  It is what God ordained for a man and a woman.

Sexcessful  ,meaning more intimacy, sex and lovemaking then last year. 

Some couples leave their zip codes to spice it up.  They go on a trip, to the Caribbean or Poconos, cruise,etc. But once they get back to their zip code back in the little box it goes. To the contrary, bring it on.

Whatever excuses you’ve been using to not engage, drop them.  Now there is no set time frame for frequency, some like it more than others.  What is your norm, just increase it and it will be conducive to your marriage. When making love you become one, that is the closest you can become to your spouse.

Be spontaneous, be intriguing, playful, flirty and daring. Tease, scream, pant , be erotic, romantic. Downright naughty.

 Do you have any inhibitions?  If you do, this is the year to do away with them.  You’re going to be sexcessful in 2012, because we ‘re going to delve.

Who is the initiator ?  Time for you to reverse the roles.

 Do you make noise? (screams) ughhhh  Silent lovemaking is for turtles, get out of your shell.

 Obviously we have more to talk about so there will be a 2nd part to this.  

Mmmm, yes I will call it positions, places and toys oh my.   It’s going to be Sextacular!

 

 

Ok2LoveAgain Marriage/Relationships/Life coaching
Contact Coach Carl/Coach Audrey @ 347-330-6471

Home________ Home (pt 2)

  Relax that is the operative word, when you’re home you want to relax unwind.   Home is a place that should be   comfortable, a place where you can exhale,  and be free.  When your mate comes home it’s not a time to pounce on them with problems like the bills, things that are broke or any stressing issues.  As I said before greet them with a hug a kiss. a massage. Let them unwind for a few minutes, take off their clothes, shower.
Ask them about their day , if you’re not interested just listen , conveyed to them that they do matter.
Have dinner ,eat together, now it’s conversation time.  Now you can interject about your day,  things to bring to their attention.
Play it by ear, you know your mate better than anyone, try to gauge when to bring up certain things. When they seem stressed out it’s not a good time to bring up a topic that will stress them out more.
If you’re uptight use that time to unwind as well, make some coffee or tea, pray, sit silently. Just relax.
Little changes in your overall routine in your daily life can bring about big changes over time.
Perhaps your mate is not working at this present time, due to the recession and the economic times. That alone can be a stressing issue one that accompanies depression, mood swings, feelings of inept. Be very considerate for the one that is not employed. By encouraging them, reassuring them that it’s only a matter before some one hires them. Thank them for cleaning the house, helping out with the kids and the pets. Try not to say negative things even if you ‘re tired and frustrated, know that they are also.  Now the one that is not employed should plan their day where they are allotted time to clean the home , and help prepare the meals before the one that works come home.
Some of you may be thinking , they don’t deserve it , and my reply to that is treat them like they deserve it and soon they will act like they deserve it. Sometime you have to give what you want to receive .
In other words make a deposit before you make a withdrawal. It enriches the entire household.
I know there are some of you that have O.C.D.  everything has to be in its place, has to be meticulous have to be right where you left it . My husband has a form of it and at first it really made me upset, than I realized ok that is the way he is . But I also asked him to relax on certain things concerning his O.C.D. which over time he did which was conducive in us living together this long.  Compromise on both sides, everything can be worked out that will be accommodating for the both of you.
Check the temperature in your home is it cozy? How can you make it more comfortable. Have soft music playing , may I suggest a little instrumental jazz, or some kind of light music. I like instrumental because there’s no words just the music and it allows you to clear your mind without replacing it with words. Like you ever had a song stuck in your mind and it keeps replaying, like a jingle from a commercial.
Ok now you get the picture , take the restrictions off in the house. Must remind you that you’re in a relationship with another adult therefore treat them as such. Let them sit in that beautiful living room, eat on that good china. Let them watch the all-sports channel, or the food channel or my favorite the life channel. It’s what relaxes them, also do something’s that relaxes you.
Lastly I like to touch on  is the bedroom, yes you know I had to go in there. Your Boudoir, should be the most beautiful , sexy, comfortable place in the house.  The Boudoir is another post we have to talk about.  There should be no discussions about the bills, or any things to cause stress in that room. That kind of talk should be off- limits their. It can be a libido killer.  Everything associated with the bedroom should be comfortable, sexy, tranquil, romantic, all about the mutual bond you share and that is love.
Home Sweet Home!
Ok2loveagain Marriage/Relationships/Life coaching
We provide marriage and relationship and personal relationship coaching for “for couples, who are committed to “doing” whatever it takes to make their relationships work better.
Contact Coach Carl/Coach Audrey @ 347-330-6471